The Art of Social Climbing

The Hechanova Fambly

I love social classes, vertical power structures, and heirarchies. That is prolly why I liked watching movies and TV series that incite social class wars. However, mainstream media usually portrays demsocialites living in a first world haven like the US, UK, and EU countries. The Philippines, albeit a third word country, is also rich with b&p’s and crème de la crème. Thanks to the Hechanovas, the Madrigals, the Arenas, the Cojuangcos for gracing Manille with their élan and affluency.

But now times have changed, playing “sosyal” is not anymore mutually exclusive to the overprivileged heirs and heiresses of Manila’s 400. As Filipinos are best at mimicry, everyone can now don panache with their loaned Mikimoto pearls and ersatz Birkins. I have compiled a list of the most common ‘social climbing activities’ rampant amongst Manille’s hoi polloi.

The Starbucks Shindig

Image Courtesy of http://www.thomashawk.com

I cannot comprehend how a mere 350 ml coffee could last for 3 hours, even more! These Starbucks charlatans loitter in the couches for hours and walk out still with their unfinished cups for the flashing. Such a shame that the once cozy coffee shop now reeks cheap.

The Apple Craze

Image Courtesy of http://www.Flickr.com

Even this Steve Jobs brainchild isn’t exempted because of the innate social status it bring to its owners. Apple still remains one of the most coveted gadgets despite its steep pricing. Thus it has become the prime target of social climbing. People who brag about their latest iPhones whilst whine about the delayed jailbreak versions. Horrors! Such a disrespect to the glorious memory of Apple’s forefather.

Pimp My Ride

Image Courtesy of http://www.blog.saimatkong.com

Meet my ‘new baby’ is the grumbling of these humbugs. Flashing their car loans for the whole world to see. Just make sure you showcase a car worthy of veneration and not your baby Vios which is more of a cabbie to me than a baby. Oh and by the way, stop posting pics of your supposedly “own car” if it was just lent to you by your company. Lols!

The Bagaholic Mayhem

Image Courtesy of http://www.birkinwatcher.blogspot.com

Prolly the best way to go up that social stratum is by carrying that much sought after Hermès Birkin. Bags have become the benchmark of one’s social relevance to the corps d’elite. Strut that vintage Kelly purse and you’ll surely earn the ire and envy of bag connoisseurs and socialites. But beware, everything now can easily be copied and faked. The “pa-sosyals” have their safe haven, Greenhills, for their bagaholic needs. So pay attention to details, because a replica, no matter how much they claim it to be a perfect copy, is in no way close to an authentic beau monde.

Now if you happen to have done one or two of these things, don’t fret. I too am a self-confessed social climber (just gone right. Haha!) Just make sure you rise above all of these in the proper time. You certainly don’t want to live the rest of your life with faux leathers and pretense. If you are not from ‘buena familia’, earn your way up. After all, it’s better to be a nouveau than a fake. =)